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Hard
Today’s blog post is brought to you by R.E.M. Every time I watch this video, listen to this song, it just kills me. Even if I’m in the best mood in the world, this song makes me cry. For some reason,...
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Wishful Thinking
I get to milestones and they don’t register. Or they don’t register correctly. You finished a step in making a quilt! Cool! Yup. Not feeling it. It’s almost worse getting a step done…because then I...
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Throwing Peas
When I’m tired, it hurts more. On a long day like today, what I need is to know I’m going home to a sympathetic ear and maybe a back rub. What I have are two know-it-all teenagers and a drop off and...
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When the Emotion Ends…
It’s a damn good thing I have a job that allows me so little time to be introspective. I make it through most workdays without having to dwell in the nasty place my brain has dug for itself. That said,...
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Running Roughshod over Me
If Friday’s a moody bitch, Saturday’s an amusement park ride…not a carousel or an easy roller coaster…the kind that throws you up and down, and you’re never really sure whether you’re having fun or...
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Hiking and the Brain
I went to sleep early last night because I knew I was going on a hike today. I shouldn’t have wasted my energy. My overactive depressoid brain woke me up two hours early and then fussed over stupid...
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Making a Stand…Over and Over Again
Today. I don’t know what to think of it. It started badly…I couldn’t stay sleeping…I kept flopping and moving and checking the clock and praying it would say that I had hours of sleeptime left (nope)....
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Brain Overflowing
Stupid fucking hormones. Watching a benign video of hot-air balloons makes me cry? How much of that is depression and how much is fluctuating hormones? Really? That’s cry-worthy? It’s cool and all, but...
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Fabric Soothes My Soul
I don’t know where to start. I have been all over the map today. It wasn’t good. So I saved myself in the end with fabric. It’s a temporary fix, though…it only works as long as I am tracing, cutting,...
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Out of the Dirt
I managed the gym, finished a good book (in one day…no idea how many pages it had, because the Kindle app says things like Location 405 of 3606, and I don’t know what that means), graded one period’s...
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Distractions
Have you noticed that I haven’t been posting about emotions and grief and all that crap? I preloaded two benign posts (I put all the pictures in before we left Tuesday) so I could write two posts up in...
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Ironing the Crone
I originally named this post “I Just Want to Sit on Your Ironing Board, Bitch: Stories of a Petulant Cat,” but it seemed like a really long title and I didn’t have a photo that went with it. Just know...
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Damn, I Wish That Were True…
I managed to go to bed at an almost reasonable hour last night, after a few nights of 1:30-2 AM bedtimes (which really doesn’t work when you have to be up at 6:30)…but then spent the next hour NOT...
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That Road Is Burnt Out…
Remember those mornings, few and far between since becoming a parent, the ones you used to covet…dozing in the morning? Not awake yet, but you don’t have to be awake either, half dreaming. Those are my...
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Apparently Balanced
My brain is kind of drained at the moment. All the activities of the day have sucked out any relevant thoughts for now. I had plenty of them before. I’m not sure where they went. Maybe they got bored...
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It Is Still So
The great weepy trifecta: dead dog, depression, and PMS…oh wait, it’s a quadfecta (is that even a word? yes, apparently it is, but…I do not think it means what you think it means)…I forgot the stupid...
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In the Dark Backward and Abysm of Time
Shakespeare? Why not. I’m reading a book about World War II and time travel…Shakespeare was quoted. I don’t know yet if I like the book…but I liked the phrase. It’s a good description of trying to look...
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Resting in Uncertainty…
From last night at an awful hour: “My god, I feel like I’m drowning in tears. I went to bed early because I was so exhausted, and now I am wide awake and crying. WTF? The brain and the body are so...
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Keep Driving…
First of all, welcome to the 300 spammers who are visiting my website. It’s nice to have you here. Please make yourselves at home, but stop sending all those stupid misspelled messages that make no...
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Not Resolving Anything…
So. New Year. I hiked…geocached actually…for the first time. More about that later…but it was supposed to be for a few hours and turned into the whole day…something about getting lost, an impromptu...
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